Archive for the ‘my sTate oF M!nd’ Category


my dear wordpress,

at first, i was so nervous thinking about how i’m gonna live my life as an asasian.. i was thinking that it might be hard for me to adapt.

but somehow alhamdulillah, i can adapt myself in no time. there are many good people here. and i get to know many good friends.

i am not comparing or anything but indeed i am becoming more confident to stand in front and face people since i came here. it was way good here. back then when i was in my high school, i didn’t get to be like that. i can say that i was QUITE timid at the time.

but here as an asasian, i learnt to be more confident and knows how to bring myself in front of people. and undeniably, i can be more open about how i feel with my friends here. i mean NOT the lovey dovey feeling towards different sexes. it was like, i can be more honest as myself.

however, i’m not saying that i was always lying in high school. its just that here i can express how i feel and be friend with everyone without dealing with statuses.. and everyone here is outgoing and sprting

lastly, yes! it was fun back then when i was a high schooler but it’s more fun as an asasian.


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I am the second child in my family. I have a big sister who is just one year older than me. After me, there are 2 little sisters and 2 little brothers. Because i only have her as my only big sis, i really looked up to her. And yes, she’s worth to be looked up to. She is just perfect as a child, a sister, a friend, a student, everything.

She’s not only kind and soft-hearted, but she’s also a very smart person i’ve ever met. She got straight a’s in her exam and was accepted to study in egypt with a scholarship in medicine. She should be in her second year this year.

I was once dreaming to go and continue my studies in the same place as her too. But unfortunately i wasn’t accepted. Frankly speaking, i was truly frustrated at that time, GOK.. But i didn’t give up and still continuing my studies here in malaysia. and truly, i love it here more i guess…

A week ago, something that wasn’t expected happened in egypt. A demonstration- a major one. It happen in most of the major cities in egypt including the place where my big sis at. When i hear the news, i felt like something was striking my heart. I was so worried that i almost couldn’t do anything. My head was never even one moment not thinking about my big sis safety.

I also thought that Alhamdulillah i didn’t continue my studies there. If not, it would totally make my parents worry more. And yes indeed, everything happens for a reason


p/s: Lets Du’a to my big sis and all of the malaysian students in egypt and the people of egypt to be safe…

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A Cousin

genki, me blog…

i feel so glad that i have a big family. my mom has 9 siblings (the first son died recently) and my father has 4 siblings (the first son died long ago)… so that means currently i have 11 uncles and aunts.. all of them has children ranging from a son and 9 children. so, i have extremely many cousins..hehe and i love all of them.

i’m happy that all of them are doing good and all of them are definitely good people. but, i wanna write about one of them- a cousin from my father side. i dont have any particular reason for choosing him. its just that he’s my cousin and also one of my many good childhood friends..not forgetting, he’s also the wali for me after my father and my both lil bros…

yea, as grew up, people’s expression on him never change. everywhere he went, people always think that he’s good looking. yes, indeed.. i’m not gonna deny the fact that he’s good looking, tall, has a good leadership ability and all. but since i grew up with him, i dont think of him as special.

its amazing how he grew up as a good human being(i dont know other word to use) in fact that his father left him and his family since he was small. and yea, he’s at the same age as me. even me myself never met his dad or i did but i cant remember. that means, he’s really young at the time his dad dies.

he definitely can stand on his own feet and can manage himself. i’m really proud to have him as my cousin. he’s honest about his feelings. i know this because when we were small, i could see that he didnt hide his feelings to the girl that he liked at that time..keke.. but its cute cuz he’s just a kid at that time.. and now, he’s a man.. he conveyed his feelings towards the person he like openly thru fb… and i asked him and yea, no doubt he being honest and admit that he likes this one girl from our high school.

now, we are taking our separate ways…he’s goin to jordan to pursue his ambition and me with mine…

proud to have such good people as my cousins and family…^^

for those that wanna know what wali is, check out this site..~!

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me blog,

today i will talk (i mean, i will write) about mum, ibu, mama, mother, okaasan, haha, ummi, emak, eomeoni, eomma or whatever y’all call her with.

when i was first separated from my family to continue my studies in order to pursue my dream and ambition, i was feeling lonely and sad for not having my family by my side. the person that i remember the most and always came across my mind at that time was my mum.

there was once i shed my tears on the verge of calling off the phone conversation with my mum and i noticed that my mum also on the verge of tears at that time..

yea, we always do not appreciate what we have in our life. when that someone or something is gone, by then we’ll realize how important are them to us in our life… i know, mother’s day has passed. but, for us to be filial, its anytime, unconditional..

so mum, love ya!!!

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hye, me blog…^^;;; r u having nice days lately??? hope every1 is…(-_^)

myb ur wondering why is my title is about ‘those’ things….

b4 i tell you why, i wanna share s’thing 1st… bout my teacher’s words… these words has always been knocking in my head and always reminds me if i wanna do s’thing…

the words r;”all things hv their own pros and cons; it depends on us of how we use it, whether it is for the benefits or vice versa. We cn get many advantages and b happy if we use it for the proper purpose and we also cn get and cause many catastrophe and griefs if we misuse it”. my teacher gave an e.g-drugs… yea, he’s right.. arent u agree??

cigarrette smoke is among of the things that i hate the most… and of coz people who smokes… if i saw ppl wif cigar, cigarrette or s’thing like that, i was like.. euww.. and no doubt suffocate wif the smokes…besides, we also cn get the disease that caused by the smoke though we never touch that thing…. scary..@___@

i hv a cousin.. its ashamed 4 me 2 admit.. but, yea, i hv a user(drug addict) cousin… ALLAH knows…having ONE user in family is already caused so much trouble to the whole family…i mean, all the relatives…i feel sorry to my uncle and aunt… they gave all their trust to their son… and they always open their heart and hand for him. each and every time he said that he had repented, they always believe in him and accept him back… but, he never change… 2 my surprise, my dad told me that he’s already in his 40’s… when my dad isnt home cuz of his work, on 1 nite, he came…so, my mom told me to call my uncle and aunt…and so, they came…then s’thing unexpected happened… they were arguing… my siblings and i were shocked and afraid, of coz… but luckily, nothing bad happened and everything was safe as he finally gave up the argument and walked away….fyi, my lil sis called the police…and they came right after he was gone… i’ll nvr ever 4get that nite…undoubtly

the gambling thing… my dad once said, gambling cn cause addiction juz like smoking and drugs do… one nite, my other uncle and aunt came to our house.. its custom actually, for them to come at nite after they came back from the mosque as they hv no one at their house cuz all of their children are working and live somewhere else… that one nite also, icame to know about a shocking truth… my parents and my uncle spilt everything about ppl who they know that involve wif gambling… and wut made me shock is, most of them are teachers… how awful and sucks truth to b said..but, thats the reality irl…my mum also said that a fren of my dad hd came to my grandparents house to borrow some money wif my dad cuz of his habit in gambling…ominous rite?? 4 a teacher to gamble and evn borrow money wif ppl 4 that particular purpose…its not my intention to say anything bad about any1… juz wanna share and as a reminder to us…^^

k, thats all 4 now…


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me blog,

hmm… ter’s an occurance Y i wanna post tis..

one nite, i was in the kitchen, cooking…and cleaning…

my parents and other family members were talking in front of the TV in the living room…

and then, my lil bro came into the kitchen to wash his hands…

he told me,”sis, dad wanna buy a new wheels”

at first, i was stunned and asked him again 4 confirmation

then, he told me,”yea.. really”

i was quite fell 4 it…but not much..@_@

then, he said,”april fool”

i was like…”wut do u mean?’

and i was calm as i didnt really trusted him…juz less than 40%..

so, i said to him, “dont u know that we dont suppose to celebrate or do s’thin and say “april fool”???”

he said he didnt know that…and so, i explain it to him…..


if u wanna know the real history of april fool, go to this site….

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sup! me blog….

its been bothering me lately…T__T

its juz poped out of my mind… idk why… but, i’ve been thinking…@_@

“am i a gud or nice person???”

actually, dat’s not really the phrase dat has been on my mind….

truthfully, it’s, “AM I SELFISH???”

i juz think dat i’m not being nice to the ppl around me…regardless they’re some1 i know-my family,friends…or somewhat stranger…

i’m reflecting myself…and i realized dat i always think about myself and rarely think about any1 else…

from now on, i think i gotta turn a new leaf… and b nicer to every1…

—->luv and respect from me^^

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